When you’re stressed, it’s so tempting to reach for that cigarette, chill out with a beer, or ransack the Oreo’s. We’ve been taught to be a consumerist culture, after all. Marketers spend billions of dollars each year to make sure we know that there’s a product out there waiting to fix all our problems. While there’s nothing wrong with businesses spending money to educate the public about their products and services, there is plenty wrong with manipulating the public, especially young people, into believing that stress management can be bought. True stress management happens when students are empowered with the knowledge that they are in charge of their own destinies, including how they manage their stress.

We cannot solely blame advertising and absolve ourselves from responsibility as passive victims. Think about it. How many of us grew up observing how the adults around us managed stress?  Did we adopt the same practices? Do we reach for a beer to unwind after class or work? Do we light up a cigarette to calm our nerves before a big exam or job interview? Do we turn to ice cream when we’re feeling lonely or bored? Do we rely on caffeine to rev us up during the day and sleeping pills to calm us down at night? Do we want to pass those types of coping skills down to our future children? Don’t we want to create a better way?

If you want to stop turning to addicting products to help you manage your stress, help is here! My interns, Kristen Szustakowski, Mike Madril, Colleen Kersten and I created a laundry list of our favorite ways to manage stress … before you reach for that cigarette, beer, late or pint of Cherry Garcia. If you have your own stress-less ideas, send them to maria@campuscalm.com.

Follow the link to read the 25 Stress Tips www.campuscalm.com/25_stresstips.html

Campus Calm had the opportunity to speak with Ross Szabo, our Mental Health Survival expert about ways to reduce the stigma surrounding student mental health. Szabo is ithe Director of Youth Outreach for the National Mental Health Awareness Campaign (NMHAC).

He seeks to use his personal experience with mental disorders to raise awareness and provide a positive example for young people nationwide. After he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at age 16, Ross was hospitalized in his senior year of high school for wanting to take his own life. Ten months later, he was forced to take a medical leave of absence from American University and was hospitalized again due to a relapse. Ross returned to American University in the fall of 2000 and began to use his broad understanding of mental health to educate others. Ross graduated with a Bachelor’s of Arts degree in psychology from American University with honors in May of 2002.

Ross has recently written a book titled, Behind Happy Faces; Taking Charge of Your Mental Health: A Guide for Young Adults.

Campus Calm asked Ross a series of questions regarding mental health on campus. Read the questions and his response here.

Through the power of Facebook, I was able to reconnect with a friend from high school this morning. We were best friends in 9th and 10th grade, but as things tend to happen in our teen years, our friendship fell apart. I was devastated. I wrote through my pain even back then. I recovered. I lost other friends through the years as I transitioned into college, and later, as I transitioned into the woman I am today. Each time I lost a friend, I learned a new lesson:

Accept what you cannot control. Did you have a falling out with your friend? Have you tried to apologize to no avail? Are you spending all your time focusing on how angry you are with your friend because she hurt you, or perhaps you hurt her and now one of you refuses to try to forgive the other?

Consider trying to accept that while you cannot control your friend’s behavior, you can control your own. Take this opportunity to do a little self-investigation. What can you gain from your fallout with your friend? What mistakes did you make that you can learn from and never repeat again? Can you grieve the loss of your friendship while letting go of your anger? Can you forgive your friend because you know that forgiveness makes you a calmer person? What did you learn about true friendship? Would a true friend be unforgiving? How can you be a better friend in the future? And the oh-so-important question: How can you be a better friend to yourself as well?

We walk through many stages of our lives with our friends. Sometimes our friendships survive the transitions. Sometimes they don’t. Blame is useless. So is holding onto anger in the long run. They both prevent us from embracing the lessons. After we take the time to ask ourselves the tough questions, find our answers and learn our lessons–if we’re lucky– we’ll meet our long-lost friends again someday when we’re wiser, stronger, independent people, able to walk through a new stage in life, together.

In the meantime, focus on being the best friend you can be to the one person who is with you straight to the end, the one person who will never leave you … Y-O-U.

Written by Maria Pascucci.  Maria is the founder and president of <http://www.CampusCalm.com> and author of the award-winning book, Campus Calm University: The College Student’s 10-Step Blueprint to Stop Stressing & Create a Happy, Purposeful Life <http://www.CampusCalmBook.com>.

Every day, in both my personal and professional life, I deal with stressed-out college students and the fallout from their over-managed, ultra-achieving, anxiety-ridden lives.

From a college senior: Worry over GPA has caused me to suffer stomach problems, headaches, insomnia and panic attacks requiring medication. I am afraid to complete this huge project worth 50 percent of my grade because I’m afraid it won’t be ‘good enough.’ Why? I have a 3.95 GPA and now I’m terrified of ‘blowing it.’ AHAHAH. How can I give this up & not let it rule my life?

A new survey released last month by mtvU and the Associated Press reveals that 85 percent of students reported feeling stressed on a daily basis.  Academic concerns like school work and grades topped the list of stressors beating out other stressors such as financial woes even in today’s economy. The 2,200 college students polled across 40 colleges and universities paint a grim picture.

As 1.6 million kids walk across the stage at graduation, one wonders what their most salient college memories will be. Falling in love? Discovering Plato? Tutoring low income kids?  According to a new study, it might just be that overwhelming stress is the most resonant memory. It shouldn’t be this way. While I’m grateful to mtvU and the Associated Press for raising awareness of student stress, it’s time we all focus on practical, positive solutions that today’s students crave. We can start by telling young people:

1. “Being perfect in college isn’t the gateway to success and happiness; learning and creating relationships are. Building networks and being excited about something does translate into jobs.”

Eight years ago, I graduated summa cum laude from college while completing a double major and a minor. My résumé was perfect, but I was a wreck. I battled anxiety, depression and insomnia because of the unrealistic expectations I’d placed on myself to be the best. Today, I’m the president of CampusCalm.com, a national organization that empowers students to prioritize their health before they graduate. Employers look for resilient, energetic, creative young employees; not one hiring manager cared about the summa cum laude notation on the top of my résumé.

2. “You are more than the measure of your GPA.”

Too many students measure their self-worth by their academic accomplishments. They’re terrified to take a chance on learning if it means earning a less-than-perfect grade in the process. That is a tragedy because it undermines the whole purpose for being in school in the first place.

Here’s what we all can do: Pull a young person aside today and tell her why you think she’s great just because she laughs at your jokes, smears ketchup on potato chips, peanut butter and jelly on waffles (thanks Dad!), or sings rather badly in the shower. In other words, tell someone why they’re special in any way that cannot be measured by a letter grade.

3. “Success starts with self-love.”

Our society sends some harmful messages about what it means to be successful. A few years ago, I remember reading about a powerful female executive featured in Glamour Magazine. She said, “The secret to my success is Starbucks coffee. I think if you’re willing to sacrifice some sleep, you can do anything you’ve always wanted, whether it’s writing a book or running a marathon.” There is nothing self-loving about not giving our bodies the rest they need.

55 percent of college students reported experiencing sleep troubles at least several days in the two week period in which they were polled, and 69 percent reported feeling tired or having little energy.

Some well-intentioned parents, policy makers and educators worry that if they tell high-achieving students that it’s okay to not stress over every single grade, test, paper and résumé builder, their students will turn into slackers and their grades will plummet. Rest assured, high-achieving students will still reach their potential. They will still be leaders. But even if a student’s GPA happens to drop one semester from a 4.0 to a 3.65 but he learns resilience in the process, that student gave himself a gift far more valuable than a measly fraction of a point could measure.

America needs a cultural shift both inside and outside of the classroom. As a friend wisely told me, “Accolades and A’s are not what life, ultimately, is about.”

~ Maria Pascucci is the founder and president of CampusCalm.com and author of the award-winning book, Campus Calm University: The College Student’s 10-Step Blueprint to Stop Stressing & Create a Happy, Purposeful Life

Campuscalm.com’s spotlights’ college stress awareness with ’10 Affirmations to Calm College Student Stress’.  Post this page of tips in your college room to help you stay focused on healthy ways to help relieve stress.  Follow the link at http://www.studentassistanceplan.com/pdfs/10_affirmations.pdf

Maria Pascucci is the founder and President of www.campuscalm.com, and the author of the award-winning book, Campus Calm University: The College Student’s 10-step Blueprint to Stop Stressing & Create a Happy, Purposeful Life.   Earning her Bachelor of Arts degree in History and English with a concentration in Writing and Women’s Studies, Maria is a summa cum laude graduate of Canisius College in Buffalo, New York.  Maria travels, speaking to college students as she helps to spread a dose of “campus calm” to over-stressed out students around the globe.

To learn more about Maria Pascucci, go to her website at http://www.campuscalm.com

Most college seniors do not know what they want to do after graduation. Unless you are one of the select few who have not only a deep passion for a certain discipline coming out of college, but experience in that discipline as well, you are most likely considering a number of different paths. But, how do you know which job is “right” for you?

First, apply and interview for as many jobs as you can. The only time you should not apply for a job is if it is one that you would NEVER consider taking. It seems like common sense, but many college seniors only apply to a few positions and end up restricting their options for employment while decreasing their likelihood of landing a job that they will really be happy with. The other benefit of applying for as many jobs as possible is that it will ultimately give you as much practice interviewing as possible. Interviewing is a skill that – like any other – takes time to refine and is very raw in most seniors. While practicing with your friends or career center staff members is helpful, nothing helps you develop your interview skills more quickly than participating in actual interviews.

Make sure you are prepared for your interviews! Going into an interview you should know details about the position you are applying for and the company as well. You will inevitably be asked why you are applying for this position with this company and you should have a response ready – remember, you wouldn’t be applying for this position if you were not a little interested in it. Additionally, have a number of personal experiences ready to speak about in your interview that reflect skills an individual working in the position would need. Think through your extracurricular activities, relevant coursework, difficult situations you have been through, et cetera and be ready to talk about each situation. Specifically, what happened, how you reacted and what the result was. Having these examples ready will ensure that you will not be “stumped” by any questions the interviewer may ask.

For you, the most important part of the interview is the question section. Once they are finished asking you questions, your interviewer will ALWAYS ask you if you have questions for them. You need to have questions ready! Not only is this important for you to be considered for a position – as it shows interest – but this is your opportunity to find out if the position is the right fit for you. Things you should be considering:

• What is the average day like – dig deeper if you get the response “there is no average day?”
• Will you be working on your computer most days or interacting with people?
• What is the company culture like? Do they treat their employees well? What are interactions like?
• What kind of skills has your interviewer seen in successful workers for this position?
• Is the work project focused or daily/weekly task focused?

Any other questions you might have that lend themselves to whether or not you will be happy in this position, you should ask. Remember, while the first job out of college is usually just that, a first job, you do not want to go through finding out the hard way that it is just not the right fit for you. The interview is your chance to ask as many questions as possible in order to make sure a position is the “right” job.

Finally, think about your offers once you hear back! Do not just jump on the most prestigious or the highest paying just for those reasons. Take your time and select the job that fits your skills, passions and long-term plans the best. Remember, selecting a job is a commitment to do a task 5 days a week for a long time. You want to make sure that you are happy doing it.